Nothing stays innocent.

ask-the-tiger-general asked:

"Hello Flaky. It's been a while since we last met." The general smiled at the younger female, happy to see her after so much time. "How have you been?"

ask-the-tiger-general:

asktwisted-flaky:

asktwisted-flaky:

"I’ve been well." Flaky said as she looked up at the man in front of her, "How have you been?"

"Oh they fired him alright." Flaky said,"They’d have to be insane to do anything else!"

{♟} “Well, since their hired him in the first place I wouldn’t exclude that they are indeed insane.” He reminded her with a sigh.

"You’re right about that." She agreed,"I bet the only reason they fired him was to save their reputation."

ask-the-tiger-general asked:

"Hello Flaky. It's been a while since we last met." The general smiled at the younger female, happy to see her after so much time. "How have you been?"

ask-the-tiger-general:

asktwisted-flaky:

asktwisted-flaky:

"I’ve been well." Flaky said as she looked up at the man in front of her, "How have you been?"

Flaky sighed,”I have no idea. I don’t know how Lumpy keeps getting jobs”

{♟}  “There mere thought that that man had his hands on one of those rides is utterly terrifying.” The general stated as he light shiver ran down his spine. “Please tell me he got fired. And that a long time ago.”

"Oh they fired him alright." Flaky said,"They’d have to be insane to do anything else!"

ask-the-tiger-general asked:

"Hello Flaky. It's been a while since we last met." The general smiled at the younger female, happy to see her after so much time. "How have you been?"

ask-the-tiger-general:

asktwisted-flaky:

asktwisted-flaky:

"I’ve been well." Flaky said as she looked up at the man in front of her, "How have you been?"

"Well, you know Lumpy right?" She asked,"I don’t know who, but this roller coaster broke down once and they hired him to fix it. He turned it into a death trap."

{♟} “Wait…” The general seemed to need time to prozess the new information. “Who in his right mind to hire Lumpy to fix an as dangerous engine as a rollercoaster? As far as I know that man his a walking catastrophy.”

Flaky sighed,”I have no idea. I don’t know how Lumpy keeps getting jobs”

derpdan:

would you rather have no internet connection or no friends

image

  • DC: Wonder Woman is too difficult to find a movie audience for-
  • Marvel: YO YOU LIKE BLACK WIDOW? HERE SHE IS IN THE NEXT CAPTAIN AMERICA MOVIE WITH A TON OF SCREENTIME AND MAJOR ASSKICKING SKILLS
  • DC: We can't allow the lesbians in Batwoman to get married in the comic, sorry.
  • Marvel: HEY GUESS WHAT WE'RE GONNA FEATURE A GAY WEDDING ON THE COVER OF AN X-MEN ISSUE
  • DC: The new direction for storytelling needs to be dark, gritty, mature and cynical.
  • Marvel: DUDE CHECK IT OUT LOKI GOES SPEED DATING IS THAT NOT THE BEST SHIT EVER
  • DC: After years of rumors, the Superman/Batman movie is finally coming, but with a new actor and suit for Batman and MAYBE a cameo from Wonder Woman.
  • Marvel: PHASE 2 MOTHERFUCKERS EVERYONE IS IN EVERYONE'S MOVIE AND THERE AIN'T NO STOPPIN US NOW
  • DC: We can try to add maybe one or two 'people of color' to our lineup...maybe...
  • Marvel: NEW MS MARVEL THAT'S MUSLIM AMERICAN, BITCHES.
  • DC: We feel no problem with Batman's vengeful personality being like wet cardboard.
  • Marvel: NEW LATINA GHOST RIDER WHO SEEKS VENGEANCE WHILE TAKING HIS AWEET LIL BRO FOR ICE CREAM
  • DC: We can't mention any superhero titles in our movies, that's ridiculous.
  • Marvel: FUCK YEAH YOU WANT A RACOON VOICED BY BRADLEY COOPER WITH A GIANT GUN? YOU WANT VIN DIESEL PLAYING A TREE? AMY FUCKING POND PLAYING A SEXY BALD SPACE PIRATE? HERE YOU FUCKERS GO
  • DC: Our fanbase is mostly white males, I'm sure our focus is-
  • Marvel: NEW SHE HULK LINE WHERE SHE GOES TO COURT THEN SAVES NEW YORK
  • DC: Wait-
  • Marvel: NEW FEMALE THOR
  • DC: I didn't-
  • Marvel: NEW BLACK CAPTAIN AMERICA
  • Marvel: TAKE ALL THIS COOL SHIT MARVEL BE OUTIE
  • Marvel: PEACE

ask-the-tiger-general asked:

"Hello Flaky. It's been a while since we last met." The general smiled at the younger female, happy to see her after so much time. "How have you been?"

ask-the-tiger-general:

asktwisted-flaky:

asktwisted-flaky:

"I’ve been well." Flaky said as she looked up at the man in front of her, "How have you been?"

"Hmm.. I’m not so sure." she responded ,"Last time I went on this ride I almost died!"

{♟} “What!?” The general couldn’t believe what he had just heard. Rides such as rollercoaster had to be equipped with  extra secruity measure, since the speed and the extreme pressure on the engine would make an accident lethal. “How did that even happen?” Maybe the maintenance hadn’t done it’s job well?

"Well, you know Lumpy right?" She asked,"I don’t know who, but this roller coaster broke down once and they hired him to fix it. He turned it into a death trap."

lanashiftdelrey:

coming out of your room at 3 am and seeing your parents

image

timkarinn:

I thought this was going to be educational…. it was

timkarinn:

I thought this was going to be educational…. it was

(Source: humoristics)

darknessbloodyshadow123:

cloudsinmycoffee9:

this is literally the greatest subtitling job that has ever been done. someone learned how to speak cat.

*laughs irl*

(Source: iraffiruse)

jesliey:

homosaurus-rex:

homosaurus-rex:

It’s actually a good thing that the zombie apocalypse starts in Florida because then the zombies only have one way to go and that’s straight up into trigger happy redneck territory. I give it two weeks before monster trucks and mullets save us.

can we talk about how this is still getting notes

The funny thing is that i can not actually come up with a counter argument for this.

celevia:

you-wish-you-had-this-url:

jeanthesexyhorsey:

Uh.

join tumblr

why is his face faded but his eyebrows not

celevia:

you-wish-you-had-this-url:

jeanthesexyhorsey:

Uh.

join tumblr

why is his face faded but his eyebrows not

hawkbye:

mcu + dnd alignments

belle-addams:

furything:

can you believe that there are legal nipples and illegal nipples

That’s it, that’s actually it.

unamusedsloth:

So many things to ponder in bear life.